same themes and cache cleared 

Tammy, to find out why the advertisement plugin crushed the site first of all disable all the third party plugins. And provide us with more information:
1. What is the software version?
2. Plugins/themes versions (if they are up to date).
3. PHP and MySQL version.
4. Did you enable the DEBUG_MODE to see if there are any PHP errors? What the errors?
5. Did you try to enable FireBug console to see if there is any JS errors?

1 both sites latest
2 both sites latest
3 php both 5.5   sql both mysqlnd 5.0.11-dev - 20120503 
4 the eroors is it confilcts with every plugin  i disabled 10 and give up

5 no i did not try 
as its not a plugin i use 

but i thought someone here be interested as to why different plugins work on different sites 
its not just them 3 plugins  i think be maybe 5 or 8 plugins that work different on each site on the same server ruining the same everything 

Tammy, if you need help to solve the advertisement plugin issue, then please provide us the error message (DEBUG_MODE set to true).

as i said i dont care on solve the issue as i dont use the plugin 

but i thought one of the team maybe interested in this and want to look for them selfs as to why

it may lead them to a solution as to why so many ppl have problems with plugins