now understand that i have a ssl on my host name too so you might not. So that could be affecting it as well.
but anyway here is the formula im using now, its working
mail.domainname.com 587
noreply+domainname.com
PW whatever
TLS
and i just tested, cipher works, header info is correct and i get the mail.
Its kind of a mixture between the two(smtp and phpmail) lol